Yet another lawyer
I spend too much time growling and being pissed. Finally the advice I have been hearing penetrates the rage zone.
I need a new lawyer and I have to go back to court for the third time. That or sink into a pit of poverty, losing it all. The garnishment and loss of child support takes a huge bite out of my monthly income. Not to mention the headaches, clenched teeth, stomach problems, stress causing me to use sick days. I have to make a move.
My first lawyer is kindof ho-hum about it, so I decide to see someone else. It takes me a while to find pro-bono. She is young, energetic and hot on my rights.
We fill out the forms and she tells me how to file it myself and get papers served. My file on divorce grows ever larger.
Ten days later I have a court date in eight weeks! I have to find food for giant, starving teenage boy!
Financial terrorists
I got my paycheck and ka-pow! Twenty five percent is gone! Garnished! And I ain't talkin salad!
I go to the bank...it's been wiped out too! Wa happened?? I had court orders. What are they good for? I have been hit by Financial terrorists!!
Ripple effect--every check I have written bounces. The bank charges, the people I wrote the checks to charge. They could shut off my utilities.
What's next?
The Lawyer gets richer...
We all meet together in the courtroom, the x, the lawyer and I. First the judge gives the usual 30 days for x to get things together thing.
See us all together again, 30 days later and the x has set up a payment plan with said debtor to pay small ? payments with a payoff date. Sounds nice.
Do I doubt x will honor this? Absolutely.
Do I feel I am in replay of the last 20 years? Absolutely.
So who is surprised?
The ex did not do what he agreed to do and fool that I am I thought he would. How many times does it take for me to learn people do not live by my standards?
I am served and summoned to court by the bill collectors of his part of what my state calls 'family debt.'
I panic! I have to sit down and think about it all. I decide I need to call my lawyer and see what to do next.
The news is this "Back to Court." Crap!
I have a clause in the divorce papers that says he will pay if I have to take him back to court to collect money.
Now that was purely silly! If he does not pay his debt, what made us (me and said lawyer) think he would pay court costs and lawyers fees?
Hel-lo! Anybody home in there?? (Speaking to self... yeah I knew you knew that! Someone might not know it. Okay, shut up rant!)
Saga to continue-
You've Been Served!
You have your final divorce papers in your hand. You have slaved over every detail of them. You have went through a whole parade of feelings from anger to grief to relief. You may or may not have had some dandy fights about them with your ex. You hoped they were the last fights you would have with said person. After all, weren't the papers 'final'?
Some people do not do the money part in their divorce; they just want out and they do not care. I think they will regret it at some point in time. History has shown me that I have to be very careful about money with my ex or I will get stung. My divorce papers were very specific. I made one mistake though, and that was thinking like me not he. I thought the divorce papers would be respected.
So the day the deputy showed up with my summons to court over a debt that was not mine to pay, I was floored!
Free at last?
The divorce is over and you and I are wondering where to go from here. We are thinking this will be a total new world and we are so right!
After years, twenty in my case, of thinking and wondering what the other one is doing, trying to take someone else's needs into consideration, to have freedom! To only think about me is a bit alarming at first. I got over that real fast!
Then the money thing started to happen and that is what this blog is about.
After the papers are stamped you think it is all cut and dried. Oh wrong! It begins simply enough...
